I have stopped feeding Daven breastmilk
for like, a week or so. Please dont be
be such an idiot and say that it's
because I've got no more milk.
Read books, surf Internet.
Have some knowledge before saying anything.

To all my female friends.
In the future, if you have a child,
do breastfeed. Like all reports
and whatever articles say,
it's best for your baby.

NEVER worry that your milk supply
may be not enough, unless you have
something medical that hinder lactation.
Go fully breastfeeding, as nursing
your baby more often makes you
produce more milk. Which means
mixing formula milk may reduce
your milk supply.

I just wanna say,














I suck.















Seriously, I do.
For whatever situation I'm in now,
I'm angry,
agitated,
frustrated.
Only to myself.

It is never easy to live happily ever after, and never easy to be happy with a big family. As the more the family members are, the more the conflicts will be.



Grandma - the oldest and probably most senile member in the family. Seems to have problem with everyone once in a while.

Dad - used to be hot tempered but now the silent one. Is the sole breadwinner in the family which impose another problem.

Mom - the still hot tempered. Cannot tolerate people showing her temper. Can be over protective at times. Wants to be in control. Is currently taking care of everything at home.

Ben - the quite hot tempered. Can be really sarcastic when agitated, which in turn upset target Mommy & Felicia.

Rica - cares about nothing, including conflicts around. Therefore never side anyone in conflicts. The Silent Protestor.

Jeremy - the outcast of the family, I should say. Never did anything right. The only way he react to conflicts - mumble.

Felicia - Does not like conflicts but can be hot tempered herself. Takes after Mommy, cannot tolerate anyone showing her temper.

Daven - the world revolves around him. One cry and the world shakes. Conflicts dont concern him, but he can be the cause of them.



Well, I guess everyone has heard about the problems that may occur between the in-laws. But now, the problem is between between Benben and Mommy. Maybe I'm included too, but I'm not voicing it out.

It seems that the both of them are having different ways of taking care of Daven. Ben is unhappy because there are times Mommy made him do things more than once by giving non-specific instructions. Mommy is unhappy because Ben acts as though he knows everything. Blah~



Both came complaining to me, but to me, both have their point and both seem to be at fault. For me, I want to breastfeed Daven, not pumping and bottle feed him my breast milk. I made an excuse saying that the pump was hurting me, and I prefer direct. Mommy let me lease him once, and said that she would let me again during the next feed, which never came. Blah~ (She, too, says things she doesnt mean.)

Hohoho. Sometimes it's not too bad getting sick. I had a slight fever yesterday. Hit 38.3 so went OUT for doctor.

I actually stepped out of that door after 2 weeks! Hahax. But by the time I see the doctor, the fever was gone. He said I had a slight throat infection. I was like huh and oh ok.



Juz got a solution to gargle with since antibodies affect breast milk. Watched tv till late before turning in. Then fever shot up again. About 38.8, I guess. Benben kept using iced water towel to cool my body temperature. But I was totally in the wanna-sleep mood.

The next day, Mommy said that it may be the tea I have been drinking that caused the fever. Plus all the tonic, wine kinda thing. Too heaty. I just miss my plain water.

I think I'm preferring direct breastfeeding now. Since I have been facing some problems pumping. Today, I tried leasing Daven on twice. It went really well, at least I think so. He can even suckle and smile at the same time. Hahax.

I guess breastfeeding really bonds mother and child. But it may not be something I can do all the time.

Confinement Part 2

I guess there's a lot of things about confinement I dont know until now. I always thought that it will only last for a month, which is like 30 days. But, BUT, it will only be over after 40 days. T_T

Most food can be enjoyed after this 40 days (That's what I'm concerned about!!). But, BUT (again!), there are food that cannot be taken for 4 months~!! Food like banana, papaya, yam & cucumber. I wonder in those Western countries, where they dont practice confinement, wont they have aches all over?

It's always good to prepare early, though I think it's not really early if I actually start asking now.
It's Daven's Full Month Day~!

It will be held on 25th October 2008. Most probably around afternoon bahx~ Anyone interested can start sms-ing me now. I need to know who and how many are coming~ ^^

Frustration - a negative feeling that can occur to anyone, but I think it happens to pregnant women and women under confinement.

It's not even a week since Daven came home. I guess tension has been building up since Day 1. Benben Mommy took care of almost everything, and we tried to help as much as we could. It's not easy taking care of a newborn. He's so soft and fragile~!

And since Benben Mommy is in charge of everything, there are times she need to go out to get groceries. These are the times we're on our own. For that few hours, we would try our best to meet his needs. But there is always one voice that discourages everything and last whole day long.



Eg 1: Mommy went out. I guess it was during the first few days, cause I was resting the whole day. Benben took care of Daven during Mommy's absence. Ahma was at home, just sitting around in silence as usual (She doesnt really say much when Mommy is not around).

But when Mommy came back, the nagging started. I keep hearing Ahma saying dont know how to take care of Daven, keep letting him cry, kinda thing. Most probably was referring to Benben and maybe me too. That lasted the whole day.

Hearing things like that once is already uncomfortable. Hearing it whole day long is really frustrating. Furthermore, I dont think it's really true, and she didnt even help.



Eg 1.5: I still remember there was once Daven cried in his sleep, and everyone went rushing to him. While Mommy was carrying him, Ahma told her that Daven is such a lucky baby. Once cry, there's someone to carry him. Her son(Benben Papa) didnt even have that.

I was then thinking if her son did not get enough care and comfort, it was probably her fault. She's the mother, isn't she?



Eg 2: Mommy went to the market with Ahma & Felicia. Just before they came back, Daven pooped alittle in his diaper. So Benben wanted to change him, but he pooped more and poop was everywhere (this actually happens often. We laughed about it alot of times). Then Benben rushed him to the toilet (cause Mommy has been potty training him there).

Ok. The easier way to place it is things were really messy when they came back. And so came the nagging. Benben cant really stand all those they-think-they-know-it-all people nagging. I guess including Mommy sometime.

Let's just say that he exploded that day. It wasnt anyone's fault, to me.



Eg 3(added on): Gary, his girlfriend, Timothy came with their 2 laptops for mapling. My mother, sister, brother & his girlfriend came in the afternoon too. I guess seeing so many people makes Ahma feel uncomfortable so she went sleeping.

I went to bed quite early since it was a tiring day for me. Halfway through my sleep, I heard conflicts outside. Not really clear, but I heard Felicia shouting, that would scare the baby.

The next day, I found out that Ahma went crazy again. After going to the toilet, she accused Gary of peeing around the toilet bowl, making her have to use a dirty toilet bowl. Well, the fact was, the toilet bowl was wet with water. Since Daven just pooped at the toilet bowl, and Gary & his girlfriend took turn to bathe after that, they washed the bowl with water.

She also said that putting my expressed milk in the fridge,and feeding it to Daven after warming up makes him have diarrhea. Well, my mother also prefer direct breastfeeding. But it would probably tire me out, since I will have to stand by 24/7.

Well, later in the day, she commented about alot other things too. Scolding, cursing about everyone, everything. But once again, it's not the first time. This happens almost about once a month. Before I'm married or after I'm married, Before I'm pregnant or after I'm pregnant, Before I give birth or after I give birth. BLAH!

Let's just say that the ones who shouldnt be blowing their top are going crazy. The one who is really stressed out is the one who care too much. Frustrated? Blogger is the solution. HAHA!

Confinement - can be defined as the lying-in of a woman in childbed; accouchment; childbirth. But it means being confined or the act of confining. I am in the state of being confined.

There are tons of things that one cant do or eat or drink or play during confinement. Here's a list.

1. No PLAIN water or cold or soft drinks.
= Whatever I drink HAS to be warm. Sometimes even HOT. Now, I can't even drink WATER!

2. No more snacks, tibits and junk food.
= Simply mean no more potato chips, chocolate, candies, blah blah blah...

3. No more bathing, or even touching water.
= Bathing with herbs is the only time to get the whole body wet. Brushing teeth would be only with warm water.

4. No wind to be blowing directly.
= To make that worse, remember you can't really bathe. And to top that up, not much of your body is exposed.

5. Constipation.
= Most women face constipation after birth. I guess I'm the lucky one.

6. Chicken, Fish, Pork everyday.
= For me, I think I'm going to turn carnivore for a month, since BenBen Mommy is much more worried about me having diarrheas. (After knowing I dont have constipation) I miss my veges and fruit juice. T.T

7. No more outdoor.
= Meaning - no stepping out of the main door. I cant even help to get the laundry just outside the corridor.

8. No bending or squatting. Bed rest as much as possible.
I kinda like this one, but sometimes it makes me feel quite useless. Cant wash the dishes, cant pick up things, cant even sit for too long..

Well, I guess the list can go on and on.. Sometimes it just makes me wonder if I can ever make it through.

=If you think Life is difficult, think again. It can be worse.=