People just start asking whyI haven't been updating my blog.
Well, simply because,I seriously lost track of time.
For the last few posts,
I have been thinking real hard
about wad I did on that day.
It seems that I have beendrowning my time with Ben²
so much that it became a habit.
It's not a bad thing
that I cant
remember wad I did on a particular dae.
It may just mean that I enjoy myself
so much that I cant remember.[I just wanna be with you a little longer.]
j0tt3d @t 10:50 AM
Yay~ It's National Day~
and it's Ben²'s daddy's birthdae~!
I know I should be celebrating,
but sometimes, you just cant control how you feel
Another dae spent with Ben² & family
But I dont know why, being with him
would make me think of Tsuki-chan & Tsubasa-senpai very often.
A little too often.
Sometimes, it even knocks me off my feets.
It's not that I dont like being with him.
Birthdae Steamboat. We ate alot,
and I made Ben² eat alot too.
I think it's the first time I ever took care of someone.
But it's Ben² DiDi mahx.
Though nothing extraordinary happened,
just sitting together and eat
is good enough.Can a person love two persons at the same time?
Can she be with one and think of another?
Sometimes, it just hurts so much thinking.
What would it be like, if I didnt like any one of them?
What would it be like, if I didnt even know them?
I love both of them
, and I mean it.
I hate to choose, to hurt, to be hurted.
But right now, there is nothing I can do
to make any one of us hurt less.
I just wanna be myself, but sometimes,
it even hurts that way...
[I love him.]
[But that doesnt mean I dont love you.]
j0tt3d @t 3:02 PM
August the 8th, the double-8 day.
Rica had common test early in the morning. *yawnies~*
Rica hate waking up early
, so I was late by an hour and finished the paper in 40 mins. Went to Orchard with Ben², mommy, Felicia and Jeremy~!
It's so fun hanging out with them. It's been less than a week
, I guess, but I feel closer to them
than no one else.
Then, we went for lunch & shopping & stuff
before meeting Tsubasa-senpai & meimei & didi. If love is spending time together, I dont mind being in love with you forever.
Even when I dont believe in forever at all. Not at all.Met Tsubasa-senpai
while mommy went to pray at temple. Arcaded till evening
. Tsubasa-senpai & siblings went to eat while we homed for dinner. Honestly, I love Ben²'s family so much~!
hahax. It sounds weird, but ya, it's true. XD[If love is spending time together,]
[I dont mind being in love with you.]
j0tt3d @t 3:02 PM
Rica love things simple.Simple is the best. Being simple is being happie.
After Rica's common test,
lazed around Ben² and slacked.
After he did his project & things,
we went to his place for dinner
'cause popo cooked nice² things
Rica is being loved by everyone
Be it the simple way,
or the not-too-simple
Rica even got to see Ben²'s childhood pictures~!!
LOL! I shall not talk too much about that,
just in case someone say I'll blackmail him.
[Love is when you dont wanna sleep] [Because reality is better than dream.]
j0tt3d @t 3:02 PM
Ben² family are so much fun~!
We actually went to Changi Beach Park
todae~! It was quiet, peaceful, nice, without alot of people
. Well, I like places without crowds. We even picniced there~!
Have egg sandwiches and BeeHoon.
Ben²~! Tell them I love them alot.
XDYou know I really do.
I've got a test tomorrow. [And, I dont even know how the textbook looks like.]
j0tt3d @t 11:46 PM
I dont like things getting complicated,
but sometimes, things just have to be complicated.
Slept for a few hours
and was woken up by Ben².
He was so worried that I'll die at home,
that he waited outside my place for at least a few hours.
Tsubasa senpai was as worried too. But I'm okay~!
Slacked, ate, slacked more.
Went out for tibits party preparation,
then was supper session with Tsubasa senpai and Thomas.
Walked alot before reaching the place they wanted.
Ate and laughed like crazy.
Well, I'm always crazy.
But I laughed so hard that it hurts alot.
I wanna keep things as simple as possible.
[I'll take the easy way out.]
Girls just wanna have fun.
[Well, I wanna have fun too.]
j0tt3d @t 11:46 PM
I didnt sleep
at all last night. AT ALL
. Talked to Ben² the whole night
, staying so awake throughout. Something is wrong with me.
I just dunnoe wad. Breakfast at Mac~! YUMMY~!
But I didnt finish my beloved muffin. T_T *stitches*
JMD-ed at 10. It's weird that I dont feel VERY sleepy,
or just fall asleep. Break-ed at 11++; Singing session *stitches again*
This time, I turned cold
. So instead of eating, I fell asleep
. I woke up warm, but turned cold again.
Running session. I was shivering
everytime the wind blew at me, but I managed to finish running~!
*3 cheersss~* Right after Natsu Practice, stitches came back again. *ouch ouch ouch*
This time, it was so bad that I perpired very badly
, and scroched in a corner
in the shower room.[I wont admit I'm sick, cause I'm not. I'm just a little colder than usual, and my tummy hurts.]
A³ BBQ. I missed Ben²
. ok. I know it's weird to say that, but ya, I missed him, & Tsubasa-senpai
too. Ate, scrolled around along. Took a longer walk with Ben². Stitches came soon after.
*faint* Cold-ed, perpired, pain-ed. Homed after awhile.[I would call that happiness. Even when it hurts.] Thoughts of the Day
I have been cherishing my time alot. [I didnt waste them on sleeping.]
I dont mind getting sick once in a while. [When people around you care.]
(But it still hurts)
j0tt3d @t 11:46 PM
August the 3rd
. A self-declared
by me and Ben². It's a day where you show your loved ones
how much you actually love them. Sent-presents-ed.
Anyway, it's just a special day. XDBugis-ed
with Tsubasa-senpai,Hoshi-chan and Ben².
Met Ben² mommy, meimei & didi.Went to arcade together
. I can just sayall of them can sooooo cute~!
They went for dinner while we
stayed for some more games. ^-^Mos-Burgered.
Mos Burger can never be
any more fun than this. I was laughing all along,
while Tsubasa-senpai jumped around
Well, it's something not easy to explain in words,
or rather, I dont really wanna explain it. hahax.Just remember it, and laugh.
JK-ed. I walked to JK with Ben²,
just because I wanted to walk. Bought something at 7-11, just because not
buying something after walking so far is weird. Sat outside of 7-11 chatting,
just because I feel like staying longer.
I know I'm weird, but I've got weirder frenx.
Hanging out with Tsubasa-senpai and Ben² is the best thing to do.
[I'll be laughing & giggling & stumbling & crazy-ing & ...]
I walked home with Ben² again.
[I think I'm addicted to long walks.]
Talking to Ben² can be everlasting.
[It's just weird how much words can flow.]
I like Tsubasa-senpai and Ben² all the same.
[I'll be happy enough staying this way.]
j0tt3d @t 11:46 PM
I skipped class
again, and seriously, I dont like
myself skipping lesson like no one's business
. So I decided to do alot of things
at home to make it up. Though I think it wont really help. I still did lots of housework.
After that, Little Rica went to Dhoby with Ben² & Tsubasa-senpai
.(I think I need to think of a short name for him.) By bus~! Yay~! Rica LOVES long bus ride
. Alone or with accompany (depends on wad company I have too.).Arcaded till 1030
. Guitar freak spoilt, but Rica still had fun with other games. I wanna try the percussion thing again~!
Maybe I can try learning the drumset too~
Mos Burger-ed. Though I just get a large milk tea, ate weird curry puff
with potato UNSKINNED.
*sick* Tsubasa went back by train, while me and Ben² took bus back. Long long long trip. ^^ Bloated from the milk tea; giddy from the bus trip; cold from the air con.
Sengkang-ed. Walk home as usual, and Ben² took his bicycle out. Talked to Tsubasa on phone
on the way, and both of us actually walked to Jalan Kayu~!
hahax. Thanks Ben²~!
I just wanted to take a long walk.
Homed at 4am. I may be crazy at times, but I always thank people around me for being crazy with me.
I am not as popular as you think I am.
[Even when people say they like me.]
Somehow I think I'm afraid to love;
[afraid to lose; afraid to be lost again;]
I dont mind people spelling my name with a k.
[But I like to emphasize on the R. eRica. eRika]
I want to be as close as possible.
[Yet he's avoiding; I lack courage.]
Long walks are good for health.
[Not to mention the nice breeze; trees; grass;]
j0tt3d @t 12:55 AM
I dont wanna lie
I dont wanna pretend that I dont care
But at the same time, I wanna be
the always-hyper-cheerful-crazy eRica
Thanks alot to my beloved Didi Ben²
for being by my side; supporting me;
and caring so much~!! Big hugs and kisses
for ya. (But I think you'll reject them. XD)I will be fine soon~!
For those who actually
care and worry about me. Be prepared to
be annoyed by the always-hyper-cheerful-crazy eRica.~=Randoms=~I think somehow I can understand how he's feeling. [He needs more time to sort out his feelings.]Please take note that 'cheapskate' is not a nice name.[And I freaking got irritated by it todae. Just todae.]
Sometimes, I just wish that someone would hold me close.[Yet I think I'm not ready for relationship.]
Food never fails to cheer me up.[That's why I love them so.]
Dont make me fall for you,
when you cant return that love back to me.愛していることは言えば、君もあたしのことを愛する？
j0tt3d @t 12:43 AM